This week I was challenged to love everything about myself 100%, quite the challenge and all throughout the week I kept on going back to this idea. What does this really mean? I posed the question "does anyone ever really love themselves 100%?"and was given the answer it is to each person's interpretation. In addition I was asked where I was a year ago and where I am today. So I began to look at my life and my journey over the 10 months and made some interesting discoveries.
First of all I discovered that even on the worst of days I no longer beat myself up wih negativity. Instead I filter my thoughts, feelings and actions through my heart and my greatness and am able to be calm and make choices that are positive to both myself and others. I can now recognize that there are only certain things within my control, everything else I have learned to let go and not let govern my life. This 100% is that I now trust myself and no longer see myself as a "mess" which used to be one of my favories lines about myself!
The next 100% discovery was that I now LIVE life. I used to rely on my job to give me self worth as that is the only place I truly felt I contributed and that I was capable. However, on the journey from my head to my heart, I realized that life is worth living and is made up of WONDERFUL things! I love and appreciate my children more than ever before. I now have a strong support system of friends with whom I can be myself at all times and who I have let into my heart and love and trust them. I am doing things and making/reaching goals that I thought to be impossible. A friend teases me about my energy, but truth be told I love giving 100% to life everyday, and am learing to pace myself in a healthy way!
The hardest discovery I made this week with the 100% challenge is how I see myself in the mirror. Even though I have had an eventful year of losing almost 100lbs, I have see very different image than most people see. I have a couple of friends who look great and are very fit and I choose from time to time to run/hike with them. I have felt very inadequate at times as I have attempted to keep up or push myself to their level. However this week I discovered that I am good enough. When I was challenged with the 100% I knew in my heart this was the area that it hit home. So this week I said thank you to everyone who complimented me with no dialogue of what I still need to do. I ran with my friends and accepted when I was told how much better I have gotten and did not challenge it or compare myself to them. I am not them, I am me and what I can do is amazing! In all this I discovered that I CAN love myself in this area 100% as well.
So what is it about yourself that you do not love 100%? Where were you a year ago? What changes have you made that are positive? Truth be told, you are most likely much closer to 100% than you think you are. I discovered I was and it is an amazing feeling.