Sunday, August 25, 2013

The Art of Seeing Greatness

So what does it mean to see greatness daily?  It is easy to see greatness when you are doing something big and accomplish it.  Or, you set a goal and acheive it.  But what about when it is just the daily stuff life is made up of, work, school, family, bills, friendships, chores, etc.  How do you find greatness in just everyday ordinary life?

As I have been on an amazing journey the last year and a half or so it seems that all of life was BIG and constant change was taking place be it weight loss, a new discovery about myself as I learned to live from my heart, a period of building new friendships, and I was on all cylinders all the time, so greatness was easier to recognize.  But, what about when you come to a place where you are "settled in?"  Not to say that growth is not still taking place, as we never should stop learning or growing, but the intensity that was dominant for many months is not there, what do you do then?

This is where I find myself lately and to be honest it has been an adjustment.  I know how to live in my heart now and when I find myself not doing so, how to get back. The friendships that were being formed over the last year are solid and secure.  The intense period of growth is now not as instense so that "high" of constant learning is not always present.  Through this I am learning I think more than ever to trust that everything that has taken place is real and was not just a phase, but is now a lifestyle.  I have recognized over the last few weeks that I do not need someone to tell me about how fearless I am, that I have greatness because I know within my heart that I do and I just need to recognize it within myself.

I have a friend that notices things all around her and sees greatness where others may miss it.  I have been with her many times and she has pointed out things going on around us and that I may have missed otherwise.  This is what I call "the art of seeing greatness."  What does this mean?  Well to me it means noticing all the "small" things that go on around us each day.  It can be a turtle warming in the sun, an act of kindness taking place, a word or phrase that was said in conversation with a friend, a sunrise/sunset while walking outside, a discovery you make about yourself, or an obstacle you encounter and get through, all these things remind us of the greatness within ourselves and others.

It is in the everyday living of life that you can be reminded of who you are, of the greatness within you, of how fearlessly you live your life if you allow yourself to see it.  This is the phase I am now in, of learning to trust myself and all that I have leanred.  To see, know, and be confident of the greatness in me.  To know that I have made the "18 inch" journey from head to heart and do so daily.  Is this challenging, sometimes more so than the period of intense growth, but is it worth it, more than I have words to express.  It is here that I have truly discovered and am discovering what I am made of, that the greatness that has been in me all my life is an active part of my life and not based on what I am feeling, it just is.  It is also here that I have realized that I do not need the reassurance from another to know I have greatness.  Not to say that I do not have friends that recognize greatness in me and tell me because I do and it feeds my soul, and I still love being called "fearless warrior" now and then as well.  However, it is not the constant "need" that it was as I can recognize greatness and fearlessness within myself. 

So it is with this that I challenge you and myself to the "art of seeing greatness" within yourself and around you.  Trust your heart and what you know within to be true that you are fealress and greatness prevails with you.  It is here that another level of growth will take place.

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Choosing to Trust

I have discovered something new about myself lately, well maybe not new , but rather clarity about a part of me that I allow worry, misery and doubt to dwell...relationships.  I do not like admitting this, as I feel that I should be past this in my life with all that has taken place in the last year or so, but alas I am not.  It seems to have hit me with full force in the last month or so as after I presented my journey at a Nurtured Heart Approach Global Summit in June, but especially as I started writing a book on my journey from head to heart!

I recognize it as something that can consume me and if I allow it make me doubt who I am, and also read negatively onto what others are "thinking" if they do not respond to me in a certain way.  The truth is, none of it is truth, but rather insecurity.  Yes, I could blame my past with my upbringing and lack of relationship, or my failed marriage, or friendships that have come and then gone....but in reality I would just be making excuses to not move from my head to my heart and if I blame these things I am making myself a victim ( I hate this word) of my past versus a fearless warrior of my present and future.

So how do I deal with this?  Honestly, it sometimes takes me a day or two to stop listening to the voice in my head saying to me  "they are mad at you, they do not want to be your friend, they are "ditching" you, they have had enough, " and to move back into my heart to where I know the truth.  This issue is a trust issue, not me not trusting my friends, but me not trusting myself to be worthy of true, long-lasting, healthy friendships.  In so doing, I at times will try to sabotage these relationships to protect myself, and to prove to my head I was right all the while my heart is saying, relax, you know better, allow yourself to trust.  Mind you, this is not with I just met you relationships, but ones that are developed and solid. 

The good news in all of this is that I can hear my heart through this process and while my head is trying to drown it out to pull me into myself and doubt, my heart  is saying remember you are fearless, you can trust yourself and others, relax!  Ultimately, my heart wins through this process and a calm settles in. What I hate is all the feelings I allow to happen before I get to the calm, but I know how to get to the calm and the process of listening to my heart and shutting up my head is getting shorter each time I walk through this.

This is life my friends...we think we should be at a certain place and then "wham" we get pulled back into a place we do not want to be.  However, the real strength, the real growth in this is that you get to choose to walk through it and move forward as a stronger person and more in tune with your heart and your greatness each time!  I know from experience this to be true as I have just walked through this once again this week!  While, I would like my friends to "coddle" me and reassure me, I know it is better when they do not because as I walk through the doubt and get to the truth by myself I OWN it, not them! 

What is it in your life that you need to apply fearlessness and greatness to?  It does not make you weak, or a failure, but instead one who is on a journey to greatness is all areas of life!  Remember, life is not a destination, but a journey, there will be setbacks along the way, but who will you listen too the voice in your head that leads to worry, misery and doubt, or to your heat that leads you to greatness? The choice is yours, I choose the heart!

Sunday, August 4, 2013

Greatness - We All Have It

Greatness...this is a theme that I have talked about a lot since I started this blog.  When you hear someone use the word greatness and that they have greatness you at first may think, wow what an ego!  But the truth of the matter is that WE ALL have greatness and just haven't recognized it within ourselves!

When I was first told that I had greatness my response was yeah right...I did not believe it as this was a foreign concept to me.  It took a while for me to understand that the greatness in me was not based on my belief on whether I thought it was true or not, it was just in me and had always been.  As time went on and I was learning to live from my heart and would make decisions from the heart I it was pointed out to me that I was in my greatness.  It was reinforced regularly and soon I began to understand and accept my greatness, what a freeing moment!  I think that the comment that was said to me that hit home the most is when I recognized greatness in my friend and she said back to me "you cannot see in someone else what you do not already posess yourself." 

Think about this...the greatness you see in another is what you already possess!  Here I was letting my friend know how much I appreciated her and what I had learned from her, and how awesome it was and how it had touched my life, her encouragement, her patience, her never-ending belief in me, her consistent guiding me to my heart, her fearlessness in not giving up on me, her engagement in our conversations, her boldness in speaking the truth to me...and as I told her these things she said to me, "you only see these things because you possess them yourself."  Powerful!  It was then that I truly realized what greatness was and that it was present in me.  Through this revelation and eventually acceptance is how I learned what greatness was and that yes, it was in me and a part of me and that I could choose to accept it and live in it each day.  I could also start to see it in others and as a result encourage them to live fearlessly in their greatness as well!

So, it is now that I encourage you to see the greatness in you.  To make that journey from your head to your heart and to listen.  The message of greatness in your heart is there and it will not steer you in the wrong direction, it will instead guide you to where you should be. It will speak to you your greatness, your fearlessness and lead you to a life of fullness!   As I have done this, it is truly amazing the things that have occurred in my life over the past year.  Yes, I will be honest and tell you that there are days I doubt myself and have to dig deep and sometimes be reminded of what I already know, but those times are getting to be less frequent and the reset to greatness easier.  It is when I allow myself to see and accept what is in me that I can be calm and move through life with confidence. 

Listen...what is your heart saying?








Saturday, July 20, 2013

On Being Fearless..



So anyone who knows me at all knows that probably my favorite word this last year has been the word FEARLESS. When I started my journey, this is the word that was used most often as I learned to step out into my greatness and make life happen.   As I was challenged to move from my head to my heart my friend would constantly tell me I was FEARLESS!   In time, I began to believe it myself and it became the word I would go to when I doubted myself.

To further this belief in how fearless I was, I was given a "fearless gem" like the one above to carry in my pocket as a reminder that I was fearless when I was feeeling overwhelmed or that I could not do something.  Soon, this gem was not needed as I let this notion of being fearless get into my heart!  This belief that because of the greatness in me, I could do anything I set my heart too.  I could move forward and make life happen, it was really my choice!

So you may ask, what does being fearless really mean?!?  Well, here is the definition I love the most " to be bold, brave, unafraid"  To me personally to be fearless means the following "that you have the courage to smile and hope on the darkest of days. That the WMD's (worry, misery, doubt) have no hold on your life that you can resolutely move through your day with courage that you can accomplish anything.I have fiound this to be true on many days that I thought I could not move one more step forward, but at the end of the day, realized I did

So where am I today?  Well, I am still on the journey, I choose to live fearlessly each day (some days more than others)  and allow myself to realize that this is a journey that allows for constant growth!  When I think I have failed, I remind myself of my greatness, remember that I am fearless, and move on - not looking back, but moving forward.

Being fearless is not magic, it is a lifestyle of courage.  Knowing that you are greater than anything that comes your way!  How will you choose to be fearless today?

Saturday, July 13, 2013

Growth and Greatness

Well, it has been an interesting couple of weeks to say the least as I have had a LOT of alone time as both my girls are out of town!  I have been on a "high" for the last year.  Yes, I have had my ups and downs, but so much has happened so fast that a day to day existance or "normalcy" has not really been a reality until now and it has proven itself to be a challenge. 

In the past 18+ months I have lost 125lbs, made a whole new group of amazing friends, been writing this blog, started wrting a book, have discovered my job is not my identity, become as assistant Girl Scout leader and shared my journey at a Nurtured Heart Approach Global Summit in New Mexico...whew!

But, believe it or not...I have been struggling with myself and negativity regarding my life, feeling disconnected, what I look like (physically) and my worth.  I have questioned whether I am good enough, what do I have to share, have I really changed, and a lot of self doubt.  I have allowed the WMD's (worry, misery, and doubt) to set up camp in my heart, and road blocked the "18 inch path" from head to heart.

Yet, as I have been running that past couple of days (this at times is great therapy for me)  and allowed myself to listen to the whispers of my heart I have come to a realization that I am enough!  I have remembered that my greatness is not based on what I have done, or even what I am currently doing or not doing.  It is not based on who I am in relationship with-I don't need any one person or persons to feed my greatness.  My greatness, my worth, my identity come from within...and these things have always been there!

Yes, I admit, I have become side-tracked and even seen some old behaviors surface slightly, but that is what makes the power of the reset so amazing, and also what makes the three stands of the Nurtured Heart Approach ( Absolute Yes, Absolute No, and Absolute Clarity) so powerful!  I have been able to reset and recognize who I am and the greatness that is in me and revitalize it within my heart.  In my alone time I have recognized that allowing the three stands to operate in my life in regards of who I absolutely am and who I am absolutely am not and to gain clarity in both has cleared the road block from head to heart and allowed me to settle back into my heart where there is peace.

The most anazing thing about all of this is the growth that I have allowed to take place, the "cleansing" I have allowed to happen of my heart all in the doings of day to day life with no "high" occurring.  This to me is perhaps the greatess growth I have had in a while.  That I don't need the "high" of constantly doing and can just be.

It is with this clarity that day to day life can be amazing and does not have to be mundane as I allow my greatness to shine in all I do!



Tuesday, July 2, 2013

Abounding Greatness

Well, I have come home full in heart after attending a conference on the Nurtured Heart Approach founded by Howard Glasser.  I was given the great privilege of sharing my journey to greatness and making the 18 inch trip from head to heart in the process!  I was overwhelmed with the amazing response I got and my heart was touched deeply.

I attended this conference at the urging of a friend and with even more coaxing presented as well.  I did not think in any way I was qualified as I am not a therapist, a teacher, a social worker, or the like.  In fact, I am not even formally trained in the Nutured Heart Approach.  But, the fact of the matter is, I have received one-on-one training as I have applied the principles of greatness to my life over the last 18 months and as a result I am living life like never before!

I discovered in an even deeper way what greatness really is and how it can not be swayed by how you feel, what is going on at the moment, or by what others may say or do to you!  Greatness just is...it has no qualifier and no one is exempt! 

So, to be totally honest, even after being at such a conference for three days and allowing my heart to be full to the point of overflowing, I tried to derail myself on the way home.  Go figure?!?  I tried to convince myself that as I returned home to an empty house (my girls are both out of town) to a job I do not like that I had nothing to return to.  Thankfully, I had three determined friends that would not give up and continued to energize me and in time the reset happened and I allowed myself to return from my head to my heart once again!

Here is what is interesting, I am still there in full force!  I have been hit with some challenges at work, I am home alone in a VERY quiet house, but I have a calmness within and a deep-seeded knowing of who I am and the greatness that is within me.  In fact, this is deeper than anything I have felt in the past year!  The roots of knowing are deeper and more meaningful than ever before.  I have vision, I know what I want to do and where I am going!

This is what living FEARLESSLY is really all about.  It is knowing that your greatness is not something that comes and goes, it is in you from the day you were born!  It cannot be taken away no matter what circumstance you are in.  To know this, allow yourself to journey the 18 inches from head to heart.  Will it be painful at times-possibly, but I can guarantee you without any doubt that the journey will change your life in ways you never thought possible.

At the end of your journey (which by the way never really ends) you will find abounding greatness that was always there. It was just waiting to be discovered and to lead you along a path of life that is one of hope, healing, grace, empowerment, courage and much more.  You will find yourself living fearlessly and knowing your are "cape"able of all things.  Yes there will be setbacks, but these just provide opportunity for more growth and more greatness!

So I challenge you my friend...what is your heart telling you?  What are you holding on to that will detour you from the life you have always dreamed of?   Listen to that voice deep within your heart and allow it to lead the way...only greatness awaits!







Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Mud Pit or Mud Spa

So I recently have let myself get bogged down in mud!  My head has had a heyday with me(I let it) telling me I am not capable of presenting at a summit I am attending at the end of this month.  I also have allowed myself to feed the fear of all I have accomplished this past year is going to diminish and I will end up back where I was. Now I know in my heart that none of this is true, but I tried to silence my head and wade in the mud for a few days-becuase we all know it made me feel better-NOT! I even went as far as to make a list of all the things I felt I was not worhty or capable of so I could wallow a little deeper!  I was sure that everything I had written down was true and felt I could prove it-I even had pictures.

So as I sat in my friend's offcie with the purpose of working on my presentation I brought out the list like a kid with a painting they want hung on the fridge!  There was no way I thought she could dispute it, I had back up statements, and like I said pictures!  So I read it to her and you know what happened next-she laughed and said you know better!  One by one she disputed everything I had written-and I argued back-determined to win! She went as far as to call it my s&*t list!  So she asked for it, I brought out the big guns and asked her with certainty what would so & so do! (I was asking her about the founder of the Nurtured Heart Approach ).  Here was her reply, he would say "get out of the mud!"  Not the answer I expected, after all everything I listed I had irrefutable evidence on-or did I?!?

I had allowed myself to became mired in the mud of negativity, of I can't, I am not, I will not... versus I am capable, I have worth, I am greatness.  She then took my list and rewrote all the negative into positive and had me read it in 1st person-very hard to do!  But as I did-not willingly mind you, I started to feel a shift take place.  As I started to see, hear, recognize my greatness once again out loud, my head could not dispute what was being said and my heart was energized.

I discovered once again it really os that simple.  All I neeeded to do in reality was hot the RESET button of my heart and remeber what is true about me that what I do is not my greatness but who i am is!  I have since read the rewrite of that list several times and each time I am energized even more into my heart and mu greatness! 

Here is the best part of all of this...the circumstances did not change-but I did.  I went back deep into my heart, into my gratness and with determination made the mud pit a mud spa!  What a difference, I was able to feel amazing the entire day and even share with others what it means to live in your greatness!

So I challenge you...mud pit or mud spa...it really is your choice and the outcome when you choose the spa is amazing!